Natale è passato; un nuovo anno è iniziato ed è arrivata la Befana, mia carissima amica, che tutte le feste si è portata via ...
Ho l'animo un po' pesante: essere impegnata tutte le mattine a pensare a mia mother to be present more often than not getting the blame and insults, I is chilling the soul and the soul. And yet ... she does not know what he has and I find myself, despite often face the evil roots on me, thinking about what will happen. What will happen in a short time when the "monster" that grows in her scream, and when the silence will take hold, forever, for what was and was ...
In my short story "The Circle" memories of my childhood ended in a happy story, as it was, indeed, our childhood, that I and my brothers and sisters, then has occurred in the adolescence, if not happy was not taken by the hand in the right way and time. Each of us has grown in its own way, individually and isolated, and I, being the second to last memory to have lived part of the torment and the vicissitudes of each. My brothers and my sisters, however, do not know my paths but those a bit 'surface that saw me on stage to sing, in pairs or in groups. Even now, for my mother and maybe for them, I am the one who sings and who would live a happy life on stage. Far from it. My mother, for example, does not know what I wanted to grow up: I asked my dad, very simply, to enroll at colleges. I wanted to work with children. But he suggested at the time of change because there were already three teachers in family. Then, finish high school, I would have gladly done the university, but I dared not even ask. Life, come with age, has given me the opportunity to work with children, even as a baby-sitter, but about a year this has stopped.
So, here I am doing home care for my mother who even likes it and even accused me every day. And here I am with the core pieces and distraught at the thought that, however, when the irreparable will happen to me will be the regret of not having even been able to fully enjoy his company, as it is taken every day to complain about what they do not has children who do not phone and unable to thank the caller or is present, oblivious of the fact that every day, everyone feels more or less and, in turn, more or less all go to her.
There are times when life puts in front of a mirror, which reflects past moments that seem light years away, and future moments that seem to come away and yet swiftly run towards us. In between there is this, that are not always able to live fully with joy.
I often find myself saying to my mother to look around, to be happy with what he has, just to enjoy the fact you can still walk for walking outdoors, smiling at whoever comes to visit, to chat with their grandchildren, when he sees them. His
negative attitude often also affects me, that in recent months I feel saddened and aged, unable to smile now.
My wish for all of us and for you, it's also a good way, is not to be never, never, never turn off the enthusiasm and the desire to smile in front of a child laughing, a rising sun and a moon that shines.
HAPPY NEW YEAR 2011!
